Five Desserts in Five Countries
A wise man once said life is short, eat dessert first. Or someone just wrote that on a piece of sketch paper, drew some colorful swirlies around it, uploaded it to Pinterest, and attributed it to an old deceased person. Desserts provide important insight into the culture of a location but more importantly, calories consumed while traveling do not count. Ask anyone and they will confirm this well known fact! Here are the top five desserts I’ve consumed while traveling, although this list will surely change when I visit Belgium in November because waffles, duh. SPOILER ALERT: The chocolate croissant pictured above did not make the list.
Banana Bread in Dublin
My family is as Irish as scone but unfortunately the best and only dessert consumed during my short visit to Ireland was banana bread. I freakin’ love banana bread.
Gelato in Sofia, Bulgaria
Bulgaria acts as the home of not only Viktor Krum and his gang of Durmstrang thugs but the location of many interesting culinary options. One can purchase a cup full of Winnie the Pooh corn. One can purchase roughly three hundred ninety seven varieties of yogurt. One can also eat what may be the greatest gelato in the entire world at Confetti Gelateria in Sofia.
Espresso Cake in Edinburgh
On a cold day in December in Scotland, where the sky turns pitch black at 3:30pm, one may stop by lovecrumbs and consume a chunk of cake that is so rich and enormous that it could double as a meal. One may eat the entire thing immediately and indeed count it as a meal because as emphasized earlier, traveling calories do not count! Also, one must climb a steep hill to reach the cake shop so if one lives in Edinburgh and the calories do count, one will preemptively eliminate them simply by traveling to the cake shop.
Chocolate Chip Muffin/Cupcake in the Dominican Republic
Many years ago, prior to the emergence of #foodstagram, humans created food for substance and energy, rather than merely as objects to photograph and use to make other food feel incompetent. Sadly, this delicious pastry that straddled the line between muffin and cupcake lived and perished long before people starred that their phones with watering mouths, scrolling and double tapping on pictures of other people’s edible treats. Like a gastronomic Rose Dewitt Bukater, I don’t even have a picture of this muffincupcake. It exists now…only in my memory.
Apple Pastry in Germany
Walt Disney modeled Cinderella’s castle after the iconic Neuschwanstein castle, which sits in the foothills of the Alps and was created in honor of a composer by a quirky Bavarian monarch and remains incomplete to this day. Neuschwanstein also serves as the place where one may first witness people using selfie sticks without a trace of irony. The short two hour train ride from Munich prepares one for the amazing views of the castle as well as for the picturesque lakes, trees, and mountains surrounding the enormous edifice. One prepares to update their Facebook picture to this:
But then one arrives at the castle and departs with photos that actually look like this:
The extremely dense clouds and fog may so dangerously obstruct vision in the area that the police close the bridge leading to the best views. Instead of seeing gorgeous mountains and an amazing view if the castle, one stands in the cold and listens to detailed description of the life and times of the Mad King
Joffrey Ludwig. One then takes photographs in front of posters for sale as opposed to the actual castle. When life presents one with struggles, and we all know clouds and fog while visiting a German castle is the definition of strife, one must react appropriately. The appropriate reaction in this case was to descend the literal mountain of disappointment, discuss Make It or Break It with your new Australian friend, and consume delicious delicacies.