2015 World Championships Men’s Team Final: Wait What?
GymMapStics did not plan on attending any Men’s events at the 2015 World Championships in Glasgow but ended up there anyway!
GymMapStics does not follow mens gymnastics nor does she really attempt to do so. She only bought tickets for Women’s team and all around final and planned on finding something to do on the evening between those two events. Unfortunately, Glasgow did not offer GymMapStics much to do by herself on that Wednesday night so she bought the best cheapest seat available and thus attended her first purely men’s gymnastics event.
After the odd couple dance pre-meet entertainment prior to the women’s team final competition, GymMapStics and Meredith opted to arrive immediately before the meet began as to avoid performance art or whatever the strange dance was. GymMapStics evening went as follows.
- Arrive at seat. Realize recently purchased best cheapest seat is adjacent to a group of Swedish fans. Think to self, “Cool! Swedish people!”
- Realize that white cross on red flag represents Switzerland, not Sweden. Flag recognition fail!
- Open Tesco Express pre-made pesto pasta salad procured en route to SSE Hydro. Marvel at fact that outside of the US one can enter an arena with consumable goods and without being patted down. Begin to consume delicious cold bowtie pasta.
- Shrug at Swiss guy to left when he looks questioningly at meal of cold pasta and tomatoes on the vine. Continue to eat the healthiest meal ever consumed in an arena.
- Watch gymnastics and eat pasta and think “HOLY CRAP, KENZO.”
Rotations 2 – 3:
- Watch vault, floor, and high bar because they are exciting and fun events.
- Feel hopes start to rise for US team but then remember they have yet to compete on the dreaded pommel horse.
- Find oneself standing up and holding a giant Swiss flag in left hand and trusty stars and stripes in right hand. Appear to have been kidnapped by the Swiss fans and have developed Stockholm Syndrome. Wait, that’s Sweden again.
- Winch Cam: Stare at phone and then experience terrible feeling of second hand embarrassment for the two people who end up on the mega wall who are clearly not going to kiss and quite probably not even a couple.
- Cheer and yell for Paul Ruggeri on floor with extremely drunk Swiss fan sitting who adds to cheers by growling incomprehensibly. Frantically wave around cowbell borrowed from Swiss fans.
- Think “OH NO KOHEI FELL ALL IS LOST FOR JAPAN!”
- Think “Guess not. Yay Japan!”
- Men’s gymnastics can be exciting when Japan and China are battling it out for a team title!
- There were rings at this meet?